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About Varied / Hobbyist AlexandraFemale/Hong Kong Recent Activity
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Today I saw you alone by yourself.
I really wanted to talk with you...
I kept looking at you, but you didn't notice me...
All you did was just walk pass me, as if I were glass, transparent in your eyes.
I had the urge to say hi, but couldn't build up the courage to do so...
All I could do was to watch you slowly walk away from me......
.
This was written on 15/10/2014. I had a crush on this guy and I really wanted to get to know him. This was how I felt at that time.
I'm so glad that I now know him and we seem to be friends! :D
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You'll never know how long I have been looking forward to see you, and even if you do, you wouldn't care. I was happy when I finally get to see you again after such a long time. However, when I arrived home, I find myself crying. It seems like I am still interested in you and can't forget you. For some reason, you remain unforgettable... I don't know why I'm so loyal to you, even though you don't deserve it at all... I wanted you to notice me, to find me attractive... I find myself looking at you at times and looking for you when I was unable to locate you... When I noticed you look at me and our eyes met, your eyes immediately darted away. We didn't talk much at all......

When I received your Whatsapp message, I was immediately anxious. There was a weird feeling inside me and I felt like I wasn't ready. I was nervous...... When I was standing at the staircase using my phone while keeping an eye on you from the corner of my eye, I think you were doing something weird and when I heard some guy said you were taking a picture of me, I wonder if what he said was true... But I guess I'll never know...

I wonder how you felt inside when you saw me again... Some girl said you were quiet... I wonder why......

When it was time to leave, I was extremely disappointed that we couldn't sit on the same car... I wanted to be with you just for a little while... I realized I still really miss you after all these years... I couldn't explain these feelings I have for you... You just have that charm that draws me in... I wanted you to know how I felt, but even if you do, you wouldn't care. Plus, that has already happened before... I don't want history to repeat itself again...... But I really wish to see you again......
Seeing you again
This was written a few days ago... I saw the person I used to love during a gathering and I was inspired, so I wrote this to express my feelings when I arrived home...
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Even though he has already completely walked out my life, I don't know why but I keep trying to bring him back into my life. I find myself stalking him on Facebook, checking for his updates and pictures or looking at his Whatsapp profile picture. Occasionally I find myself asking about him through people he knows.

He's not attractive, I admit. But there's something about him that draws me in. There's some kind of charm surrounding him that I can't stop being attracted to him. He's like a drug that I keep coming back for more. He's like a curse that I can never break.

Even though I don't get to see him at all nowadays, I still find myself thinking of him. Part of me wants to keep in touch with him, but then part of me doesn't want to get hurt again. Perhaps I was hoping that maybe after a few years he would return my feelings, but it's that false hope that makes me keep coming back.

I was insanely, madly in love with him. Even now, I can't seem to find anyone who could make me have the same feeling as I did for him. It's kind of pathetic, really. He's like a shadow that keeps following me. I can't shake him off. I think the only way to break this curse is for him to fall in love with me or have someone else come into my life who can make me have the same feeling, but this time, we are both equally in love with each other......
The curse
This was written on 16/1/2015.
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Today when I saw you out of the blue, my heart stopped. I didn't expect to see you. I couldn't be myself. I was nervous. I didn't dare look you straight in the eyes. This feeling was weird, something I have never experienced.

I find myself glancing over at your direction every now and then. My eyes kept darting towards you. What is this feeling? Have I fallen for you? You were with a few girls and I can't help but to feel uneased. But why?

You called my name with a grin. I was slightly shocked. I gave you a brief smile and a nod...

After that, you came over to my table, talked with a girl, then had to leave. You said goodbye to her and me. I only waved without looking at you.

The second time, I saw you again. You were leaving. I said "Hey", you said, "Hi, bye." I looked back at you as I was walking, but you had your back on me, walking away...

I miss you... I think......
Weird feelings
This was written on 11/3/2014.
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People will always come and go. Although some seem to get along pretty well with you, they may just be passerbys.

Today, I've decided to remove some people from my life. Although it's sad, I'm sorry to say this is how life is. Some people may seem important to you at first, but as time goes by, the connection will fade away, and soon that person will be history. He will never be part of your life.

I started removing all the conversations we had, and unfriended you on every site with you in it. I removed your number. I haven't removed the pictures we took together though, which I won't delete, but will keep them away from my sight. But there's one thing that I, sadly, can't remove. That is the memories we shared together. They will always be buried deep inside my head, never forgotten.

Sometimes that's one thing I like about myself. But then again, it's also something that I hate about myself, as I will never be able to erase those memories and think of you at random times. Then, I'll probably smile, but after that I'll also cry, because the past is past...

I may have removed you from my life, but I will never be able to remove you from my head......
Removing people from my life
This was written on 5/8/2013.
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sandra1328
Alexandra
Artist | Hobbyist | Varied
Hong Kong
Hello everyone! I am Alexandra, but you can just call me Sandra.
I have always loved drawing and taking photographs.
I hope to find a job that involves creativity.
Interests

Premium membership!! ^^

Sun Jun 3, 2012, 10:52 AM
  • Mood: Cheerful
  • Listening to: Hole To Feed-Depeche Mode
  • Drinking: Tea


I'm so happy! I have always wanted to try to be a premium member and today an anonymous deviant gave it to me! I wish I knew who that was so I could thank that person personally!!
It's only for four weeks but I'll cherish this four weeks.
I'm currently trying out some new features like polls and journal skins. It's really fun!! > <"
I think I'm going to miss being a premium member after four weeks.. But for now, I will explore the features of being a premium member!!

* For the person who gave me a premium membership, thank you very much!! It really means a lot to me!! I am very thankful for this! >3<"

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Comments


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:iconawkwardgeon:
AwkwardGeon Featured By Owner Apr 30, 2015  New Deviant Hobbyist Filmographer
thanks for faving:) (Smile) 
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:icongamerandartist35:
gamerandartist35 Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2015  Student Artist
感謝您的最愛和我沒有學講中國我只是在開玩笑XD ,如果詩歌的作家採取了一些我做,如果你說他們是一些錯誤的語法和一些東西不要“詩歌的樣子告訴我我已經知道 and if this message is wrong sorry hehehe

gamerandartist35.deviantart.co…
Reply
:iconsandra1328:
sandra1328 Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
Excuse me, but what the hell were you talking about? o.O I had to Google translate your message to understand it a little bit more.. But I still don't understand what you're trying to say. Please just use English, thank you.
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:icongamerandartist35:
gamerandartist35 Featured By Owner Jan 20, 2015  Student Artist
hehehe sorry i said thank you for the fav sorry again for that hehe i was trying to make a joke welp i failed sorry again
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:iconmoriachi-san:
Moriachi-san Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2015  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thanks a lot for the fav <3
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:iconayeshaphantomess:
AyeshaPhantomess Featured By Owner Dec 10, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
thanks for the fave!
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:iconalyssofhearts13:
Alyssofhearts13 Featured By Owner Nov 16, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks for all of those favs!!! XD
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:iconsandra1328:
sandra1328 Featured By Owner Nov 17, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
You're welcome. :) I feel like I can relate to some of your poems.
Feel free to check out mine too~ -v-"
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:icongrace-zed:
Grace-Zed Featured By Owner Nov 14, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Hiya! Thanks a lot for the faves. :) Much appreciated. 
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:iconasinglepetal:
ASinglePetal Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2014  Student Digital Artist

Thank you for the fave!

My commissions are open

asinglepetal.tumblr.com/

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